Pink Bunny Foo Foo

...and the grilled cheese debate continues

I wanted a grilled cheese sandwich for dinner last night. Dan usually makes them...I never have watched him make them, they always taste delicious...didn't think technique was a big deal.

I decided that I was going to make them for us. He was watching TV...he heard the clanking of pans and sprinted into the kitchen. I got out the square/flat grill pan. The look on his face was "utter shock" - he stood off to the side as I proceeded.

I took out 4 pieces of bread. I started buttering. I buttered one side and then started buttering the other side and he stopped me...uh, what are you doing? I said that I was buttering the bread. He then let out,"ALL 4 sides?????? WTF? I explained that this is how my Mom taught me to do it. She buttered all 4 sides, put 2 down on the pan, when they started to brown, she flipped them, put the cheese on the grilled sides, constructed the sandwich and then grilled one side at a time.

He just kept saying over and over...that's wrong. That is so wrong, OMG, who butters both sides of the bread? The inside remains un-grilled - soft and cheesy goodness is how the center is supposed to be! Trust me on this! You construct the sandwich before it even hits the grill - buttered sides out. HOW DO YOU NOT KNOW THAT????

At this point it became comical. I could not stop laughing that my Mom is apparently the biggest grilled cheese hack on the planet. I also explained that she's been known to cook grilled cheese in the oven and I thought he was going to pass out from the horrification. Yes, today that's a word.

We then took 15 minutes to write a Facebook poll to post amongst our friends. The results....Everyone makes grilled cheese like Dan. SOB!

I'm crushed. Here I thought my Mom was the grilled cheese god...come to find out, not so much. In the world of grilled cheese, my Mom and I are freaks.

Sure, in cooking there really is no right/wrong way to do some things - taste is what matters...right?

So yes...I need more data. How do you make your grilled cheese sandwiches?

weekend delights...

The weekend went o.k. headache wise - food wise, not so much. Met friends for dinner after work on Friday. Mexican - there was not a veggie on my plate. Didn't care, was fighting off a near migraine and I just wanted cheese smothered enchiladas and beans with lots of chips. I had eaten light during the day, but not that light, LOL. The meal was fantastic!

The Midrin helped the headache - I feel like it blankets my brain with an ice crystal blanket - my arms and fingers do tingle though - doesn't bother me if I don't lose my vision, etc. It's worth the trade off.

Had the garage sale on Saturday with a few minor break downs - a girlfriend was digging through a clothing bag that was shoved off to the side and she quickly tried to hide something behind some boxes. I asked what it was...she said, "nothing" - I pretty much wrangled her for it. The item was Ace's tuxedo from our wedding. It was in a garment bag, but I knew exactly what it was. We ended up buying the tuxedo because then he was able to then take it on our honeymoon Disney cruise. :o( It pretty much sucked seeing it all folded up in a hefty trash bag. My girlfriend took care of it and made sure that I didn't have to see it hanging on a garage sale wrack for 10 bucks (we paid almost $1000 for it) - She is going to take it to the dry cleaners and then to a local consignment shop for me. God...I have some amazing friends, I'm so thankful for that.

Saturday night was spent eating out with more friends. We tried a new, trendy Italian place downtown. It's a super sweet LEED building - Dan was in heaven...there was pizza and Ducati's in the same room. This place had clothing, motorcycle gear, motorcycles, scooters, and super chic/trendy Italian furniture and lighting.

Side note: My friend Deede is an architect and really into high end design stuff. She invited me to go on a sketch safari with her a few weekends back. A bunch of her architect and artist friends sketch buildings downtown and then picnic together and talk about the buildings, sketches, etc.

Anyway...we sat down in these funkalicious plastic chairs - the whole place was decked out in black and white - the dishes reminded me of something from Ikea - so I mentioned that out loud. Deede basically said, "Shut your mouth girl!" - Come to find out, they were super high end Italian stuff - Hah!

Now while I pride myself in my artistic abilities and decorator flare, I am by no means contemporary in my design likes. Cool for other people, just too harsh for me. I am more of a traditional girl with a little shabby chic vibe. I'd be way more shabby chic if I lived by myself.

So back to the pizza - yes, always gotta bring it back to the food. They had a pumpkin puree, smoked mozzarella, parsley, sage oil and shaved ricotta salata and pancetta ham pizza - Dan wasn't brave enough to try that - we stuck to pepperoni, olive, fontina and mozzarella cheese - but Deede and her husband had the yukon potato, pancetta ham, crescenza cheese and rosemary oil pizza and said it was awesome.

So yah - I was pretty much an eating machine all weekend. No workouts, besides the million squats and lifts at the garage sale - My goal for this week is to get in at least 5 workouts and to stick to my freakin WW points.

It's all about being random today...

Random Foo Thoughts...

#1 - I think caffeine is definitely helping with my desire to always be eating. A soda or coffee curbs my appetite for hours on end. I used to get anxiety from caffeine and that is why I was never a coffee drinker or caffeinated soda drinker. It's amazing how something I used to fear, is actually helping with the low grade headaches - and my diet.

#2 - Headaches make me crave certain foods. Toast is my latest craving. Sourdough - super crunchy with a tiny bit of butter. Before that it was veggie/chicken soup with orzo or brown rice. I'm pretty sure it has nothing to do with the actual headache - but it reminds me of my childhood when I was sick. Soup, toast, crackers - I want it all. I have also been craving apple juice. Thankfully I've found some low sugar alternatives, because juice calories are insane.

#3 - I went to Homegoods to get "my decorating on" and came across the cutest damn ornaments on the planet. I am on the search for more. If you live near a Homegoods and want to help a sister out  - I'm obsessed with the below dog ornaments and I need to have enough to fill a tree - so go! (no seriously, if you find some, I will send you money - they are $3.99 each and obtaining them has become my new obsession.) My Mom suggested cutting one apart to make a pattern to create my own. I'm going to try other stores before performing any puppy operations.

#4 - I also stopped into my favorite boutique to pick up some additional striped metal tins to incorporate into my Christmas decor. (I'll be putting that up after Thanksgiving) The owner asked what I did with the tins I had already purchased. I showed her the Halloween photos that I posted here on my blog and she asked if she could use them on her website to show people how customers have used store products in their homes. She wants to to have a talent showcase section on her website. She also asked if I'd be interested in helping her out in the store with displays - she loved my attention to detail. I'm smiling just typing this - I used to do displays for Crate and Barrel, the Gap, Petite Sophisticate and Strouds. I miss doing that, so to have a local shop window to play with, total heaven for me. Yes, I'm weird and still obsessed with the little bookstore in "You've Got Mail" - I will one day own my own shop.

#5 - My brother got a job! He's working as a head pro/Director of golf at a course in NorCal. He was pretty close to moving out of state, so I'm thrilled! He was out of work for 10 months and at or near his breaking point. The entire family really needed this good news!

#6 - Saturday is the last of the garage sales to get rid of the storage stuff. It will be perfect timing. This upcoming Veteren's Day - Nov. 11th would have been Ace's 41st birthday. I really do think that some of you nailed it with your blog comments on my original headache post. I think getting rid of storage brought me back to a place of trauma. A dark place that took a hold of my every thought. I believe that it is definitely a contributing factor to these migraines. Wouldn't it be awesome if my headaches stopped the minute I let go of the balloon next Wed.?

Thanks again for the supportive comments and emails - so many of you suffer from migraines. My heart goes out to anyone that continues to suffer from them. They are suck on top of suck with a side of suck.

Me and Midrin sittin' in a tree...

I swear this isn't going to become a blog about my headaches - but it's what is going on with me right now.

Some of you have asked how I'm doing, so I thought I'd respond here.

The headache chart is coming right along. I pretty much just had low grade tension headaches until last night. There was no need to bring out the big Midrin guns until then. I admittedly had a horrible day filled with lots of drama and stress...so there was that. I also had an upset stomach due to an egg salad pita I had for lunch.

I downed a Vanilla Coke, then took my first Midrin. I grabbed my new fake fur blanket and hit the couch with my sleeping pillow. I had the warm orange glow of the Halloween lights and daylight saving dark skies to sing me sweet lullabies. I then got the shakes and the shits and pretty much wanted to kill myself. At first I was thinking, great, now I've got the flu...but I think it was just the combination of everything. An anxiety filled day, the new medication and an upset stomach.

The good news is that the meds stopped me from getting the full on optical migraine. The neuro said to give it a good 4-6 migraines before determining if it was something that I was going to stay on or not. The bad news is that I may need diapers if a side effect is indeed the big D.

Right now I'm just feeling overwhelmed. I feel like a cruddy wife. I come home from work, I complain like it's another part time job and I'm indecisive about everything. Food, what to watch, when to go to bed, what to do next, etc. I've never been like that. It's an uneasy feeling to not be there for Dan.

It's like I've checked out of my body...I space out, close my eyes and just count down the minutes until bed time. This is so out of character for me. I'm always on the go, juggling plates, putting out fires, etc. Now I just want to make it through the day without crying out of frustration.

Higgy came through like a champ last night. He followed me from the couch to the bathroom to the bed. He laid by my side for hours. He licked tears from my face and just snuggled with me. Now if I could just get him to talk. I swear, I would blow a genie's wish on making that happen. Screw world peace and being thin for the rest of my life...I want Higgy to talk. Not all animals - I'd go Dr. Doolittle insane...I just would wish that any animal I owned could talk...oh wait...maybe I would go Dr. Doolittle global - my wish would then also need to include a "turn off" switch so I wouldn't be distracted by all of the Moo's and cock-a-doodle-dos. She said cock.

I would also wish for these headaches to be over...and yes, I do realize how totally shallow the above paragraph might seem to some....and after having a 3 plus month headache, I laugh at you.

What would you wish for?

This one time at headache camp...

The CT scan results were unremarkable. The neurologist said it was basically done to rule out a tumor. An MRI is what is needed to learn more - but insurances want you to try the CT first.

While I was glad to get the "no tumor" news - having watched my Mom go through a brain tumor and the surgery that followed - I was happy to not have that on my plate. On the other hand, still unable to determine what is causing these stupid headaches continues to be annoying.

I really liked the neurologist. Several people in the doctor's office complex mentioned that he was an excellent doctor. He spent almost 2 hours with me. He took five 8.5x11 pages of notes.

He explained in great detail what headaches are. Went went over my health history. He asked me to walk him through my daily headache and then one of the ocular episode headaches. We pulled up my CT scan on the computer and went through the different slices and explained things to me. He talked about all of the different options out there to treat headaches and then did a series of eye tests and other reflex tests, etc.

He wants me to track everything for the next 3 months. What I eat, how much sleep I get, the severity of my headaches, the amount of exercise I get, what I eat/drink, the weather and anything else that might be of interest. The goal is to try to identify triggers for prevention.

He took me off Imitrex and is starting me on Midrin. He explained it as a "fire extinguisher" approach. Take 2 pills at the onset of the migraine - and follow every 2 hours until it has subsided. If I find that I'm taking Midrin often, we will switch to a "sprinkler system" approach - preventative medication that would be taken daily.

He's fairly certain that it's genetic. It often skips a generation and my grandmother suffered from migraines on my Mom's side. They usually start post puberty and if you don't get them as a teen - if you are going to get them, they tend to happen in your late 30's, early 40's - yep, that's me.

I asked about food triggers and caffeine - he encouraged me to stick with caffeine for the tension headaches - those are what he is calling my daily, bottom of the back of my head, headaches - the more serious level is the ocular migraine - which screws with my vision. Those are mostly right side, over my right eye.

He wants me to stop taking Aleve, Advil, Tylenol, Excedrin Migraine and anything else I've tried to take to deal with this. He just wants me to stick to caffeine and Midrin until we get things documented in my daily logs. Good thing my back/tail bone is feeling pretty good right now. As for the food triggers, he said that everyone has their own triggers...I need to find out what mine are. It's an individual thing. Sure, red wine, cheese and chocolate are usually mentioned by people that suffer from migraines - but it doesn't mean that's what it is for everyone.

I asked if I should stop taking BC pills - my primary care doctor recommended that. He asked how long I'd been taking them (since I was 16 was my answer) - he saw no reason for me to go off them. He said I was on a super low dose pill and my blood panel from 4 months ago showed normal levels - he just really doesn't think it's a contributing factor, but is also willing to explore it further if we need to.

It's definitely a wait and see thing. I'm sitting here with a headache as I type...awesome. I swear, it feels like it's never going to end - and headaches must like cookies - because I found myself baking them last night - during Biggest Loser - ZOMG...what happened to the girl that pretty much watched from the treadmill?

She's apparently "out of office" until things improve with her health. Sigh....I wish. Eating healthy and exercising will be part of my 3 month logs...I always feel better when I'm on track, just need to cut myself enough slack on the migraine days where I can't even step on the ground without pain. Those will be the days when I get home from work, get in my PJ's and let the world pass by without guilt...as I drift off into a drug induced slumber.

Bewitched - Halloween 2009

The hubs and I went to a Halloween party this past weekend. We took some pictures before the party and yes...Higgy is lifting his leg in the background, Hah!

 

 

 
 
We had an awesome time at the Halloween party, lots of super creative costumes...everything from balloon boy to Billy Mays (best costume ever....Kaboom!)

Getting out took my mind off the whole headache thing - I go to the neurologist tomorrow...nervous and scared, but I'm trying to stay positive.