Pink Bunny Foo Foo

Beyotch Blanket Bingo...

I try to be the strong one. I dress up my true feelings in different costumes to trick people into thinking that I'm not hurting. I'm sure some people can see right through my charade...but it's just what I do.

If I'm pissed, I bite my lip and let it fester until it becomes a boil. I then find myself bending over to accept other people's excuses like they're the best ass medicine ever.

If I'm upset, I hold it in until my stomach or head hurts. I distance myself from everyone and then I top off my upset sundae with a good spoonful of tears.

I'm not good at hiding my crank factor and overall bitchiness. I have trouble directing it towards the intended individual or situation causing my angst. I just blanket the world with my bitterness. It's not a pretty thing and I'm not proud.

I am so frustrated with my current health situation. I still have yet to hear from the surgeon. I called my primary care doctor this morning and I snapped. She talked me down from the ledge and she's seeing me this afternoon. I need drugs. I need something to take away the razor sharp pain.

I'm tired. I'm tired of pretending like nothing is wrong. I need a big dose of something that will take my mind off of things.

I need a vacation.

Happy Birthday to us...

Major husband/wife competition in full force with the MotionX Poker game that I wrote about the other day.

My Stats - All tables unlocked, all dice unlocked and 11 out of 14 gems collected.

His Stats - 3 tables unlocked, all dice unlocked and 10 out of 14 gems

YES, iWin.

I'm sucking the life out of my phone battery. The hub told me to turn off the sound and vibration to save battery life. I looked at him and then put the phone between my legs and claimed, "Vibration makes me happy." -  I did this for no other reason than to see his face. Classic.

After 3 hours of playing and eating apple crisp for dinner, I decided to get my lazy ass off the couch for some activity. The pool and fountain both needed water, weeding needed to be done and there was other misc. backyard chores to tackle. I did my usual backyard walk around and noticed something on the lawn. I immediately looked at Hig and wondered why he took a massive dump on the lawn. (He has his own dog run and will beg me to let him into the house so he can go through the dog door to his own run when he has to go potty - yes, we are strange.) He'll wet plants in the big backyard, but nope, nada...he knows the no dumping rule.

I grabbed the poop scoop and headed on over to Mt. Everest. I noticed that it was a lovely ash color...interesting. I'm thinking, WTF did Hig eat to produce such a mound? I move it with the shovel a bit and it's dark brown and hot pink underneath, WTF x's 10. After some further CSI work, I discover that it's a piece of birthday cake. A piece of sprinkler soaked - layered birthday cake...upside down, smashed into the lawn...shit style. There is no fecal aroma...this is straight up soggy, chocolate, cake. Um, o.k.

We live next door to 3 girls, ages 2, 4 and 5. (Yah, what were they thinking?) My guess is that one of them launched a piece from their own backyard. Crickety old folks live behind us and it would have been about a 150 yard throw over the swimming pool, a shed, an opened umbrella and various other backyard ornamentation for the opposite side neighbors to have done this.

I picked it up, hosed the chocolate off the blades of grass and went about my chores. Thinking to myself the whole time...wow, that was so random.

Goodbye my Tivo love...

Goodbye Tivo...Hello Direct TV HD Tuner. Yes, we had a death in the family. The master bedroom Tivo died. This lead to Tivo musical chairs. We moved the HD Tuner from the front room into the bedroom and then we purchased the new Direct TV tuner to fill the empty hole.

We bought one, we didn't lease it...Didn't ask the husband why...just forked over the grand for the new tuner, satellite and various tools that went along with the install prep. Yes, a grand is ridiculous, but TV is my hobby, life and love. Sad...but so true. I am definitely one of those people that could plunk myself in front of it...all mind numbing day long.

My husband orchestrated the perfect upgrade/move. He had both satellites and tuners hooked up until the very last minute. This included spending 1/2 the day in 106 degree weather on the ladder/roof.

Being the beyotch that I am, I had placed a 7:00 Big Brother 10 deadline on him. Priorities people...

He aligned the new satellite, got all the cables hooked up through the closet panel and then the switch-over happened. It was beautiful. We had limited HD stations with the older Tivo HD tuner...the new tuner has a plethora of HD possibilities.

I dare you to drink every time you read the word tuner, wow.

I immediately went to work on learning the new remote. Page 1, yah, Page 2, um, o.k...screw this...I can figure this thing out on my own. My husband hates that I never read directions. He has come to live with this lovely fact about me. We pressed on. We got season passes programmed...and he got everything else working. The front door security camera, the caller ID notification, etc....just in time for Big Brother. Who's the man?

I pretty much laughed through the whole episode...seriously, where do they find these people?

New Orleans has some screws loose...WTF? There is no way she would be touching the Foo do.

I'm going to pump you up is hysterical with his diary room comments..."What are you...like a hundred?" but wow, I'd like to buy a bigger head for that body. Natural...um sure buddy.

Grandpa Gerry is too sweet...but seriously...a fall in the first challenge and a week on slop...Marine, yes....but I'm thinking this could be a problem.

Memphis...dude you are a barrrrrrrrrtender. He brags about his womenz all up in him...buying him cars, etc...then cries like a b!tch that he doesn't own a car in the challenge. Guess he's busting out his shady games early on.

Keesha Hooters - Hil said it best...a meatier and less whiny version of Danielle from last season.

Dead Poet Dan seems slightly "not right" - way too much early game on.

That's all I have after one show...I need more time to get my shred on. No real favorites yet...right now I'm liking Ollie.

Project Runway starts tomorrow night...Bravo...I'm on it.

iPhone heaven...

So enough medical stuff for a while...I feel like I'm eating and breathing medical terminology and doctors - I need a break.

So I spent all weekend with my iPhone...when I said I was addicted to MotionX Poker, that was an understatement. I've unlocked the Monkey Table, the Tiger Table and I have only 3 dice left to unlock. I'm working on unlocking the next table...yah, it will be a while...unless of course I could quite my job to play dice poker for the rest of my life.

I've also been creating masterpieces with the EtchASketch app. My only complaint is that if you use the knobs to draw...your fingers touch the screen and that leaves a mark...since you can also 86 the knobs and draw directly with your finger on the screen. Love that you shake the phone to erase.

I've also been obsessed with Shazam - the sickest free app I've found to date. I am always the girl that sits in a restaurant or shops in a store listening to the music...wondering, who sings this? Well my friends, this little app is bombdiggity goodness. You just hit the "tag now" button, hold your iPhone up and it works it's magic. If it recognizes the song (have not found a single instance where it didn't) it spits back the artist/album/date of album, sends you an iTunes link to listen or buy and links to a YouTube video if there is one. I tried it with songs on TV and it nailed it EVERY SINGLE TIME. It also worked at Starbucks this morning, sweet! Team Shazam with Pandora and you are golden when it comes to identifying artists/songs.

I also got a Loopt account...just one step closer to me getting sucked into Twitter and Facebook. I've resisted for so long...like kicking and screaming resisted...but I think I will be caving soon.

If you have downloaded any cool applications - free or not, let me know.

I thought long and hard about getting a new phone, but for now...I'm perfectly happy with the software update on my old one. I have GPS in the car...so that solves that problem. I use WiFi at home and work...so for now, I'm sticking with my original phone.

Now I must get back to poker. 

I'm o.k...

I woke up early yesterday morning with heart attack level anxiety. Major panic over what the day was going to bring. I hadn't eaten solid foods in 24 hrs...I prepped like the instructions said and away I went to the surgery center. I checked in, was given a gown and lovely booties with treads...apparently I was going to be tearing it up on the hospital bed ride from the waiting area to the actual OR.

I remember feeling very uncomfortable and then it was over. This was just the exploratory part. This confirmed that it's not cancer. I can't even begin to tell you how much relief I feel.  I will still have to have surgery, but the worry level has gone down quite a bit.

I was in a lot of pain when I got home. I popped some happy pills and crashed on the couch. I left the hospital bracelet on to get more sympathy from my husband when he got home from work. He is right in the middle of a huge project with major deadlines, so my parents stepped in for support.

I TM'd him to make sure that he knew how the evening was going to go. It went something like this:

Me: Are you going to take care of me tonight?
Him: Yes
Me: No, like really take care of me?
Him: Like spoon feed you and shit?
Me: Yes
Him: Do you need me to stop at the store to buy anything special?
Me: Flowers, Magazines, Stuffed animals, a puppy, comfy blanket and whatever else...
Him: How about a table saw?

He arrived home and immediately made his way to the couch where I was parked for the evening. Higgy was all curled up by my side...I know for a fact that we looked damn cute. He kissed me on the forehead (no gifts in hand - bastard) and he whips out his iPhone. He did the upgrade the night before and had downloaded a mess load of apps.

He clicked on his new PhoneSaber app icon and Star Wars came alive in my living room. He started swinging his iPhone through the air all Luke Skywalker lightsaber death match like...Higgins freaked and used my face as a springboard to get to the back of the couch. I was left with a nice cheek gouge...that burned like a mother fucker. (O.k. slight exaggeration on the arm swinging...but the rest is all true)

I couldn't help but laugh...wow, what a sweet way to take care of me...adding to my list of shit that was sore and uncomfortable.

He did make up for it...I am now addicted to playing Motion X Poker Dice, thanks Dave2 for the review.

My surgery consult is next week. More waiting and scheduling to be had. I just want this n-mare to be over. I need to get back to feeling 100%. You just forget how lucky you are to have your health...until something like this comes along as a reminder of that.

"A" Game...

The one positive that has come out of this medical stuff is that I've reconnected with a lot of friends via email and phone calls. Thank you, thank you, thank you. I needed some talking off the ledge and you all stepped up with your "A" game.

The Internet is an amazing thing. I love that everyone has their own story. The level of comfort that comes from reading the following words...Is there anything I can do? I've totally been where you are with the waiting game...I've had many surgeries and here's my phone number, please use it to call me. I have been reading you for years...you've always been there for me without even knowing it, I want to be there for you now...wow, I'm just overwhelmed with gratitude.

I did get in to see the specialist yesterday. I am having an exploratory procedure done on Friday and the doctor is 90% sure I will be having surgery the following week. There will be more tests and some really uncomfortable times ahead, but I got some answers and we're moving forward. Nothing super scary at this point, just my huge fear of anesthetic, hospitals, etc.

My back surgery (10 plus years ago) pretty much sealed the "I hate hospitals" deal for me. I did really poorly with the anesthetic, but I'm chalking it up to being because I was laying on my stomach for the 8 hour spinal fusion surgery. I ended up in the ICU with fluid in my lungs and other complications for days. That was followed with a week in a regular hospital room. I know the upcoming events will be much more mellow.

I'm banking mind numbing shows on Tivo - just recently got hooked on Tori and Dean - Home Sweet Hollywood. I know lots of people find her to be annoying, but she cracks my shit up. I think it's because she reminds me so much of a college friend I had...and there is the whole 90210 thing - I have said it here before, yes, I have all of the 90210 dolls...The hub informed me that there was no way in hell he would ever agree to a dog stroller for Hig. Um yah, no worries there, not ever seeing myself wanting that either.

How Much is my House Worth? - Yes, totally obsessed with that show. I find it so interesting what people view as priorities for updating. I wish they had an open house across America day where you could just knock on a participant's door to check out their digs. The ridiculous reactions when their houses appraise for less...is a little over the top, but it makes me giggle.

Flipping Out - Jeff Lewis makes me feel normal. Enough said.

Deadliest Catch and Deadliest Catch, After the Show - My childhood friend is a producer, director of photography and cameraman for that show...I'm so super glued to it every week.

Shear Genius - I'm saving up some of these for my recovery time - kind of can't stand the way the show works, but it's a train wreck thing for me. Can't turn away.

Design Star - Pure genius and it feeds my creative interior design soul.

Army Wives - Good for an eye cleansing...it's Lifetime and a box of Kleenex for me with this one.

That's pretty much what's filling up my Tivo right now. Sad? Yes, confirmed. I can't wait for the real stuff to come back in the Fall. Is is weird that I'm already planning an excited about that?